The Reason

Throughout the years, I always wondered what my purpose was. As a young kid, I always say "I want to be just like my dad (who's a physician). Three years ago, I remember writing my personal statement for the Nurse Practitioner program at UC Davis, and it makes me smile to know that the feeling I had that time is still very true to this day. 

I loved being a nurse, but it wasn't enough. Contentment is not a fixture, it comes and goes, like a sun beam. It lingers and you can't hold it forever. I wanted to do more for other people

and in this new role I have, i feel that I finally have the power to do that.

After graduation last year, I was so eager to start working. I got offered a job to work as an acute Trauma Nurse Practitioner in the hospital. I thought "THIS IS IT", but I went through so many bumps and mishaps, that I didn't land that position. I got very depressed. I honestly don't remember the time I have felt something like that. I didn't want to leave my house nor talk to people. I spent days in front of the computer, getting lost in the days playing video games. That lasted for 6 months.

I always say "things happen for a reason" and even during those dark days I didn't know what the reason was, I just took a deep breath and believed that God has better plans for me than I have for myself.

Last February, i signed my life away for the next two years to work at a FQHC (Federally Qualified Health Center) as a family nurse practitioner. This was the reason I was looking for. It's a blessing to serve the people who needs help the most. It really is. It gives you a different perspective in life and makes you thankful for what you have.

It's a great feeling to change someone's life for the better; to make someone smile, to cure a disease, to get someone off pain medications so they're able to say "hey, i am actually pain-free", to give people control of their OWN health, to help build families, to prevent sickness, to educate, to heal.

I sit here with a warm cup of tea, it's Sunday, and i never thought i'd see this day when I actually look forward to Mondays AND Fridays at the same time. I love my job, and tonight as I end this post- i'll leave this quote from Steve Job's commemoration speech:

Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle.